Mostly Thoughtless

Tam Brahm, thank you ma'am

Sunday, February 06, 2005

Slisha Maajar Hajjaar Shady!

It never fails to happen. Always, after spending a few days in the midst of IITians, I end up thinking to myself: ‘It is true. Drugs are a major problem here.’

A number of you (one, if I’m lucky) reading this are probably still in school and seriously thinking about joining IIT. Actually, you’re probably not, the only thought currently occupying your mind is ‘Why isn’t my stupid school more like DPS?’

Anyway, even if you are, this post is not meant to discourage you from your dream. On the contrary, it is a lesson of sorts that will help you feel right at home if and when you finally manage to enter the hallowed portals of one of the Indian Institutes of Technology, study in the hallowed classrooms, live in the hallowed hostels and pee in the hallowed toilets.

One of the great things about being an IITian, aside from the luxurious living quarters in which, if you’re lucky or skinny enough, you can actually rest your entire body, is that you don’t have to speak the same language humans do. Instead, you can speak the language that generations of IITians before you have spent years perfecting - a language that is now so perfect that its entire grammar and usage rules can be printed in a classified advertisement.

Yes, it is true. These IITians are extremely smart and they certainly know how to make do with very less. This is reflected in their very own patented language, as there are only about 2 verbs that you will have to learn in order to rewrite the complete works of Shakespeare. We will come to that in a moment, because right now, we urgently need to go to the bathroom…..

Yes, as I was saying before nature called, IITese is a very simple and efficient language to learn and use. And I’m going to teach it to you in this post. Of course you probably think it’s hard to learn a whole new language, because you spent 4000 years studying French in school, and you have bad memories of having conjugal relations with verbs and learning half-witted sentences where some girl called Marie is wearing a very pretty dress. But, we, as professional engineering students not studying in IIT, know that what you actually need, as an outsider, is to learn practical expressions that can be readily used in real life IIT situations, like for example, whether Marie would be willing to lend you ten bucks. But before we get on to the expressions, here, for your quick reference is an IIT-English dictionary:


Bog /bog/ n. toilet, rest-room

Cup /kup/ v. to fail at something. cup-level /kup-le-well/ adj. pathetic (also cuppax)

Funda /fun-da/ pl. fundaes /fun-days/ n. something that explains. hi-funda /high-fun-da/ adj. brilliant

Gult /gult/ n. a person whose native language is Telugu. gulted /gult-ed/ adj. screwed-up (also gultax)

Hajjaar /haj-jar/ adj. denoting a great degree of. - Syn. many, much, very

Junta /jun-tha/ n. general public, including gults

Level /le-well/ adj. of a high standard. (as a suffix) similar, resembling

Maajar /maa-jrr/ adj. greater in size, amount, number, or extent

Ob /ob/ w. abbr. obviously

Pack /paek/ v. to give up, to get up and leave. pack-level /paek-le-well/ adj. cup-level

Pain /pay-n/ n. irritate, bore

Pseud /sood/ adj. cool, neat, fashionable. pseud value /sood-val-you/ n. coolness, neatness

Put /put/ v. do, read, write, sing, dance, perform a manicure, rob a bank etc. etc.

Puts (in the form ‘puts with’ /puts-vith/) v. have sexual intercourse

Shady /shay-de/ adj. suspicious, disreputable, dubious, generally bad….

Slisha /sly-sha/ adj. to a small extent, to a hajjaar extent (sarcastic usage)

Thadaal /tha-daal/ adj. amazing, too-cool, pseud, hi-funda

Warrashsht /wur-ush-t/ adj. horrible, the pits, cup-level, hajjaar shady


There! Done! Isn’t the language simple? Yes, they are clever, those IITians, to think up something like this. So, now, without further ado, onto to the practical phrases we promised:


In the Hostels

Hey, where to put piss? (Hello, where do I urinate?)

Bog? Ob, but put fundaes. (In the toilet? Obviously, but how do I get there?)

Waaarrraaashsht! (That’s the toilet????)


In Class

Class is slisha paining. (The class is very boring.)

Ob! The Prof is maajarly cuppax (Yes, you are correct. The professor is greatly pathetic.)


You get the general picture, don’t you? Now, if you have any questions or doubts regarding this beautiful language, we’ll be happy to answer them for you.

Q: What is the correct grammatical usage of ‘puts with’?

A: This is a handy phrase used to denote the act of fornication.

Eg. “Jennifer is pregnant.” “Oh good, who did she puts with?”


Q. Which of these is correct: “Ekta Kapoor is maajarly cup-level” or “Krish Srikkanth is hajjaar warrashsht”?

A: Both are. Also, alternatively, you could use “Ekta Kapoor and Krish Srikkanth are shady junta.”


Q. I majored in English and I strongly believe that the plural of ‘funda’ is ‘fundae’ and not ‘fundaes’ as you have wrongly mentioned. What do you have to say to that, mister?

A. Whoever put fundaes on English to you was ob cup-level. Now stop paining and pack.


Q. Is there any difference between “Maajar” and “hajjaar”?

A. Ob. The word ‘maajar’ can be used while dealing with military matters such as: “Maajar Ram Prasad Sharma put pseud-value by putting victory against the terrorist junta” whereas ‘hajjaar’ should be used only to describe things that are ‘hajjaar’ something.

Eg. I had hajjaar beard. So I put shave.


So, junta, that’ll do it for this post. Hope I put enough fundaes on IITese for all of you. If you still have any doubts, feel free to put comments. I’m gonna pack now ‘cos I need to put some sleep. Till the next time, put lots of care and have some thadaal fun!

55 Comments:

Blogger Ashok said...

Add these:

grub: meal.
crash: sleep.

So perhaps it'd be better to substitute crash in that last line. I totally agree that IITese is disgusting.

Guys, check out my blog.

7:04 PM  
Blogger Vinod said...

Whoa, whoa, hold it!!!!

I never said IItese was disgusting. I think it totally rocks and all my IIT friends know that. In fact, I speak it all the time. And I figured grub and crash were pretty general anyway.

7:58 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Lol, too funny dude!!!

8:31 PM  
Blogger Sarath said...

nice compilation, but expressions are constantly evolving. would like to add another popular usage which does away with the use of the singular.

q:Booze are there?
A:are there. so basically puts only..


Cuppax prof...Pain are there!

8:46 PM  
Blogger Aadisht Khanna said...

Machi you left out 'country' da. Warshtesht.

10:41 PM  
Blogger Nandan said...

ha ha. pseud post machan. want to see what the IIT junta make of it. i agree with u man the lingo is amazing.

and ashok slisha nice try. we know u have a blog. kindly stop putting ur url all over the place to attract eyeballs. "Have you read all my posts? If not, I'd request you to do that and comment on them." shhessh do u actually have to write that on ur blog.
this guy seems maajorly shady to me.

keep up the good work vinod.
too funny man

10:49 PM  
Blogger subss25 said...

Machan,
What da..u put some arbit fundaes on our(IITM) lingo. For outsiders like you it looks shlisha shady..but having lived on campus for four yrs i can vouch that its a God level lingo. Infact i was maajarly gotten used to it that i was speaking like an alien at IIMA !! I had to put max fight speak normal.
But every residential college has its own lingo and commonly used words. IIMA has its own culture. I could smell lingos in Madras Univ ppl as well.
Anyway thanks for bringing back some good memories.

1:12 AM  
Blogger Vinod said...

Sarath thanks!

Folks, you see yet another example of IITian brilliance. Doing away with the singular form completely.

Pseud Max are there!!!

5:59 AM  
Blogger Vinod said...

Aadisht,

'Country' are not really IIT. I remember we used to use it in school itself.

6:01 AM  
Blogger Vinod said...

Nandan, thanks machi!

And Subbu,

HOW THE FUCK DID I FORGET 'ARBIT FUNDAES' AND 'PUT FIGHT'?

Shit! Anyway, thanks!

6:03 AM  
Blogger boomingvoiceofgod said...

Givvupp! Kapoor level! Horror mistakes in the post.

BOGS..not bog. You know the fund right?
Hajjar is not many, much, very. It is simply "more than one". :)
Slicha, not slisha.

Add RG to "arbit fundaes" and "put fight". RG man!! the very principle IIT runs on! how could you forget that? :))

6:55 AM  
Blogger pr!tz said...

hehehe... was worth the wait, I guess! Did I tell you? I am doing this book on IIT-Delhi... This info is definitely gonna help! Have to ask the IITians here, how they would liek a whole page on 'IITese'....
;-)
Wait to go!

10:11 AM  
Blogger Praveen said...

Vinod,
I was supposed to start memorising word lists from today. Paavi, ippadi kuzhappittaye! I'll start next week I guess :)

10:55 AM  
Blogger Shamnath said...

The gultness!! the gultness!!

Slisha hajaar nice try at lexicography, ra.

6:33 PM  
Blogger Vinod said...

Kapoor level?

Lol!!!!

And no Suds, I don't know the fund behind BOGS, do put it up here!

And I know it was slicha, but think it's been corrupted to slisha these days. It's evolved when you've been away, dude!

And yes folks, a truly dreadful mistake. Add RG (Relative Grading) to your IITese vocabularies...

And while we're on additions, I can't believe I missed GIVVVVUUUPPPP! Should've spent more time on this post...

7:35 PM  
Blogger Vinod said...

And Pritz, don't know about the IIT-D lingo but I guess should be similar without the obviously Tam-influenced stuff.

And good luck with that book!

7:36 PM  
Blogger Vinod said...

Praveen, sorry dude!

And Shamanth, wanted to add your 'airange' also but decided, as BOFi said, that it was probably a one off.

But folks, this guy is like the living breathing IITese dictionary.

7:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ever thought of researching the lingo of Bitsians.. I mean people from BITS Pilani... you would probably find that pretty interesting too.

7:22 AM  
Blogger Ekanth said...

Vinod, Pinra da! Actually, paadhi reply puriya maataengudhu :-)

12:49 PM  
Blogger boomingvoiceofgod said...

BOGS = Bathroom of Graduate Students :D

NICEESSSTTTT TRYYY (add that to the list) slicha evolved to slisha! Which fruitmax kafir told you that? Mucha..its the other way around! Slisha got corrupted to slicha..

2:17 PM  
Blogger Vinod said...

Hmm, would appreciate it hajjaar if some one could put more fundaes on BITSese....

3:27 PM  
Blogger Vinod said...

Ekanth thanks. I can understand how you feel. I was feeling the same when I first came in contact with it.

3:29 PM  
Blogger Vinod said...

Hmmmm, Sudhon.....Ok da, point taken....

folks, it is 'slicha' I guess.

And about BOGS, that would mean BOG is 'Bathroom of Graduate'! Still makes sense doesn't it????


And I'm really really curious? What the hell is a 'fruitmax kafir'???? :)

3:32 PM  
Blogger Ashok said...

RG /aar-jee/ —adj. (of a group, esp. a branch, or a person, or, less commonly, a thing) characterized by actions that are purely selfish and which are to others' detriment; (by extension) having a tendency to cheat others cleverly of what is perceived to be theirs by natural law. —n. the act of benefiting from something which is at the cost of someone or something else; progressing by hindering others' progress. —v. perform RG. —adv. in an RG way. [abbreviation of Relative Grading]

6:01 PM  
Blogger Ashok said...

Vinod, —Give up, which you lamented forgetting to add, is pretty general too (I am referring to my suggestions about crash and grub). The criterion for inclusion should be whether a term has got popularized enough to become the standard term for what it means, irrespective of whether it in general use means the same thing or anything at all.

Nandan, —Thanks for stopping by. Will remember what you said.

7:38 PM  
Blogger Vinod said...

"The criterion for inclusion should be whether a term has got popularized enough to become the standard term for what it means, irrespective of whether it in general use means the same thing or anything at all."

Frankly Ashok, I didn't understand that line. Do put fundaes.

And I wanted to add Givvvvvuupppp, said with that precise intonation, not simply Give Up.

And as far as your suggestions were concerned, 'grub' as a verb may be IITese. I'll grant that but 'crash' is way too general.

But yeah, please put fundaes on what that line meant...

9:23 PM  
Blogger Vinod said...

Btw, etymology I should have included in the post.

The fail grade in IIT is a 'U', which looks roughly like a cup. Hence, we get the word 'cup' for 'failure'.

9:55 PM  
Blogger Ashok said...

Vinod, —I meant that, if a word that's in common use is also part of a lingo but with much greater frequency and/or with a change of sense, then one must not ignore the word while listing the peculiarities and defining features of that lingo. So that, if instead of walk the speakers of the lingo habitually say trod, then trod deserves mention as a feature.

By that measure, the replacement of crash with sleep (though in English crash indicates some irregularity), being a habit with the IITians, calls for recognition. I don't think in general one makes that substitution routinely.

My beef is (i) that these expressions are an automatic levity machine, whose success lies in reminding the hearer of the free spirit, the breaking away from conformity, that the expressions are supposed to stand for (this is a subconscious effect surely), and (ii) that, because of their vague senses, they make non-commital and thoughtless statements easy (if the show was "high-funda", what exactly was it?).

10:26 PM  
Blogger Arun said...

Hey Vinod you forgot 'Put arbit fart'!

11:10 PM  
Blogger Neela said...

Muchan hajaar junta seem to be putting arbit fart here da. Pseud that u have caught on to IIT lingo. but muchan there is a maajar funda u seemed to have missed out... there is this simply amazing gift of gult which can be suffixed to any expressions.. .cup level raaaaa... ent raaaa... cuppax raaaa.... what a cup raaa... wuursssschttttttt raaaa.... without raaaaa no IIT lingo is complete.. and dont u dare change bogs to bog!!

4:58 AM  
Blogger Vinod said...

OK Ashok, finally understood. Folks, "grub", "crash" are there.

And Arun, lol, you're right!

6:50 AM  
Blogger Vinod said...

And Neela, yes raaaaa. how could I have not put that down raaaaa? Seriously, I'm now regretting going to press... er...going to the publish button without consult more IITians.

Anyways, hopefully, all the shortcomings should be cleared up in the comments section at least....

6:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

LOL!!! You could easily take over from all that glory Chetan Bhagat gets.

2:41 PM  
Blogger Ashok said...

slicha/slisha. Reliable sources have it that the etymological corruption is slicha, coming from the Tamilized adverb for slightly, slightta. The softening of the t is a mere jocularity (often also seen in right). Slisha would seem to be a second-level corruption and quite inexplicable.

3:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

living with a coupla IITians..
sucks! the language specially!!
mark

3:25 AM  
Blogger Vinod said...

Thanks Anonymous! And Ashok!

And Mark, you'd better be prepared for some serious bad-mouthing by all the IITians see your comment. Anyway, thanks for coming. Keep visiting!

6:58 AM  
Blogger luNaTic said...

good fun readin your posts man.
esp the drugs n dps part.

keep ur vacuous thought trains plyin.

9:09 PM  
Blogger Sneha said...

Is there a term for rip-roaringly hilarious in IITese????????

In which case I would use that word prefixed with hajjaar , to describe this post..

You seem to have covered all ground with the post and the comments it has generated..lol..very very nice..Infact was just discussing IIT lingo with a couple of IIT buddies the other day...will direct them to read this post..

11:16 AM  
Blogger Vinod said...

Thanks mercury! Do ask them to leave comments on what they thought...

11:30 AM  
Blogger Vetty Max said...

Maajor hi-funda pseud max post da.

One word you mised out probably due to the fact that this is used mainly in the hostels. That of poonding, i.e. line kku neduvula poorarudhu. I think this is a speciality to IITM. There is also gumbal which we use a lot.

One more thing is how these words are easily used in the vernacular languages. For example crashing becomes crash adikkaren in Tamil and crash koduthunnanu in gult. The -ing is changed into adikkaradhu. Similarly mugging becomes mug adikkaren, boozing booze adikkaren and so on.

And don't change bogs to bog.

12:26 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Guys, cash seems to be missing from the list. well, the lingo is actually brings good memories, but i dont think its something to be proud of. i believe its quite natural thing to have a lingo, and infact all the colleges should be having it. may its more pronounced in iits, as it is kind of semi formal unlike very informal at other places. English isn't our own language, and most of us haven;t been living with it since childhood; therefore to have a common lingo to express wit, humour etc would be a difficult thing in such regionally diversified environments. lingo helps adding more feelings to simple words. But certainly its not something to be very proud of, as typically "junta" seems to be.

The lingo with in colleges with more undiversified population, i guess is more effective and interesting, but not enjoyable for the first time we face it. same is the situation for you, vinod.

spy

9:57 AM  
Blogger Vinod said...

oh spy, I donno how many ppl I'm gonna have to say this to. I think IIT lingo rocks! I don't think it's bad at all and I don't think I've given that kind of feeling in my post either...

8:19 PM  
Blogger ranjan said...

Nice post, dah :)

But u missed out the famous "kat le / katlofy / kata ker etc. etc." as in "get out" or "leave it".

I guess its much more used on the IIT-KGP/D campuses !!

9:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

As someone pointed out, how did you miss 'poond'!!

Poond /poond/ n. to mysteriously appear, just in time (JIT), ahead of you in a queue.

And, to follow the tradition - don't change bogs to bog!

1:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

machan this sucks...not only do they think they r the smartest they make us feel stupid with their stupid language (if u wanna call it that)...strongly suggest you stop partonising this crap....english as a language is hard enuf to learn!

6:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Holy crap, I came across a blog pretty similar to yours earlier today. I also have one that pretty much talks about business opportunity classified ad related stuff. You should check it out sometime.

1:12 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

looks like you forgot enthu in your enthu :) ;
anwcase waytodgo dae

2:02 AM  
Anonymous vidya said...

So when are you gonna publish ur "'Trash'ter's Unabridged Dictionary"?
very creative stuff :)

8:53 AM  
Blogger Pleiades said...

Hajjaar Phunny... :P

9:28 PM  
Blogger Lone Crusader said...

Hey Vinod, unnda vida vettiya iruka oru amma research panni irukaanga..topic was "slang used in IITM"...read it here
http://archiv.tu-chemnitz.de/pub/2006/0020/data/MAthesis_EvelynRichter.pdf

1:34 PM  
Blogger Lone Crusader said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

1:35 PM  
Anonymous Sanketh said...

You forgot some important words, but I am going let you go for now.

Btw, in answer to the English question, "Now stop paining and pack." isn't actually appropriate. "Dont pill da" is probably a more compact and realistic expression :)

12:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

interesting fact about the use of the word "bog(s)" for toilet. The British more often than not call a toilet a bog. e.g. "You're out of bog rolls" which means that there are no toilet roll in the loo.

I've noticed that most of this slang has spread from the IIT campus (beautiful btw) to the rest of Madras as well..been using many of these terms for as long as i can remember esp. worrssht and slicha

1:57 PM  
Blogger Jillu Madrasi said...

Dude -- I am writing an article on this lingo. I don't IM so could you please email me :

jillumadrasi@gmail.com

Want more details about you, quotes etc.

Thanks, jm

1:21 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

^^ nice blog!! ^@^

徵信, 徵信網, 徵信社, 徵信社, 感情挽回, 婚姻挽回, 挽回婚姻, 挽回感情, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信, 捉姦, 徵信公司, 通姦, 通姦罪, 抓姦, 抓猴, 捉猴, 捉姦, 監聽, 調查跟蹤, 反跟蹤, 外遇問題, 徵信, 捉姦, 女人徵信, 女子徵信, 外遇問題, 女子徵信, 外遇, 徵信公司, 徵信網, 外遇蒐證, 抓姦, 抓猴, 捉猴, 調查跟蹤, 反跟蹤, 感情挽回, 挽回感情, 婚姻挽回, 挽回婚姻, 外遇沖開, 抓姦, 女子徵信, 外遇蒐證, 外遇, 通姦, 通姦罪, 贍養費, 徵信, 徵信社, 抓姦, 徵信, 徵信公司, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信公司, 徵信社, 徵信公司, 女人徵信, 外遇

徵信, 徵信網, 徵信社, 徵信網, 外遇, 徵信, 徵信社, 抓姦, 徵信, 女人徵信, 徵信社, 女人徵信社, 外遇, 抓姦, 徵信公司, 徵信社, 徵信社, 徵信社, 徵信社, 徵信社, 女人徵信社, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 女子徵信社, 女子徵信社, 女子徵信社, 女子徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信社,

徵信, 徵信社,徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 外遇, 抓姦, 離婚, 外遇,離婚,

徵信社,徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信,徵信社, 徵信社, 徵信, 外遇, 抓姦, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信, 徵信社, 徵信社, 徵信社, 徵信社,徵信,徵信, 徵信

11:57 AM  

Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home