Mostly Thoughtless

Tam Brahm, thank you ma'am

Friday, July 30, 2004

Duh!

I was watching one of those stupid morning shows on TV the other day when it struck me that only the dumbest people ever call up these shows. Seriously, if you ever feel dumb, turn on the TV, watch one of these shows* and you'll immediately feel better.

So, as I was saying, the show I was watching, it went something like this

Hostess: Hello viewers, welcome to 'Dumbass', the only show (at this time-slot, on this channel) which lets millions (actually tens) of people know what you feel. Today, as it has been every single day this decade, our topic for discussion is 'Do movies have a degenerative effect on kids?' Oh, look at this, we already have our first caller. Hello.

Caller: Woo hoo, woo hooo, yaaaay, yipppeeee, mom, dad, grandma... come here quick...

Hostess: Hello?

Caller: Hello hello, I'm so excited I can't even talk.

Hostess: Relax. Don't be nervous. Go ahead and say something.

Caller: I know, but it's so tough getting through to you that I'm speechless with delirious excitement.

Hostess: Wait a minute, didn't we talk yesterday?

Caller: You remembered?!!!! woo hoo, woo hooo, yaaaay, yipppeeee, mom, dad, grandma...she remembered...

Hostess: Ha Ha Ha (the fakest laugh I've ever heard) ok ok, what song can we play for you?

Caller: Please play your favourite song.

(I solemnly swear that the folowing is true)

Hostess: Ok, do you want to dedicate this to anybody?

Caller: Yes, I want to dedicate it to my friend's new sister-in-law.

Hostess: What's her name?

Caller: Donno.

Hostess: You don't know the name of the person you want to dedicate this song to?

Caller: Yup. No idea.

Hostess: Ok fine, we'll dedicate this song to your new sister-in-law.

Caller: No no, my friend's.

Hostess: Ok, your friends.

Caller: No, not my friends, my friendddd's new sister-in-law.

Hostess: Ok whatever. Done.

Caller: Thank you very much. Bye.

Hostess: No no, wait a minute. What do feel? Do today's movies have a degenerative effect on kids?

Caller: Degene... what?

By the way, to get over 'New', I did the only thing I could think of. I sat and watched all the three 'Godfather' movies. My god, do they rock?

*Vinod's First law of Television

At any point of time, on at least one TV channel, there will be a call-and-request show.

6 Comments:

Blogger subss25 said...

Stop watching all these stupid shows and practice Sim CATS...Btw, when is CAT ??

Polly

7:47 PM  
Blogger Vinod said...

Seri Thalaiva,
Nee yenna sonnalum seri thaan!

And what the fuck is that Polly!

8:43 PM  
Blogger subss25 said...

That is my Nick Name at IIM A da..

7:22 PM  
Blogger savita said...

Dai...how have you been da...been a little busy with work and all. currently in new york. Cute post...have you also noticed that once you switch TV on ..within 5 mins someone will be cryng on one of these hindi channels..thought i'd just drop in that thought after your painful observation of that show...take care will mail soon.

11:47 PM  
Blogger Vinod said...

Hey Savi,
Good to hear from you after so long! How've you been? and what're you doing in NY? New job eh?

6:22 AM  
Blogger Kingsley said...

Kingsley's corollary: At any given point in time, the number of available request shows available outnumbers the number of intelligent viewers 2 to 1. ;)

6:19 PM  

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